Monday Update – Week of November 12th, 2012

Welcome to Monday Update, where we begin our journey to the end of the year. November is pretty close, I think, to the end.

Anyway…

Prince of Persia: Warrior Within – Ugh. UGH.

During my second playthrough of The Sands of Time, I had the intention of zooming through the rest of the series. I really, really want to play The Two Thrones, even if it’s weird in trying to please two different audiences (one likes lighthearted adventures, and the other likes goths and Godsmack, apparently). However, now that I’ve played through The Sands of Time yet again, I find myself at the crossroads – will I finally play Warrior Within?

Well, yes. But not before complaining about it, shouting to the sky at what a grand injustice it all is.

I wouldn’t say Warrior Within’s aesthetics turn me off from the outset – they were going for a much darker plot and themes, so it made sense. I question replacing the voice actor purely out of consistency (although hearing Yuri Lowenthal yell “You bitch!” at someone would probably be funny), but it’s not a game breaker. And seriously, metal thong bikini? Sure plays into Western fantasy stereotypes, huh? I thought this was the Prince of Persia, not Cimmeria. Same goes for the music – Arabian styled metal, I guess – not being terribly interesting or endearing. Nothing has been undeniably broken in the translation to the new setting – in fact, I’d say things are much improved overall. Platforming retains the same pleasures and sequences – so far, only one truly new element has appeared, the curtain ride, and it provides the opportunity for the developers to move the Prince in different vertigo-inducing ways.

Combat, on that note, has improve somewhat. Considering this came out prior to God of War, it’s interesting that they play rather similarly with lots of combos and options – not that any of them are necessary in any way, shape, or form. You can, really, just smack that main attack button and end up fine in most situations, although I find enemies strike really quickly and interrupt you more often than not. You can also take damage while vaulting – I’d call that stupid. Playing it on PC probably doesn’t help, as a game that tells you “Press Button1, Button 3, Button 4” as a combo command, I don’t exactly know which one is which on my PS3 controller. I’d call it a lot more challenging than the first, as well, but stay away from hard mode – enemies have an aneurysm-causing level of stamina, and it takes DAYS for them to die. That, my friends, is NOT FUN.

There’s something that just feels off about the whole thing; I’m not inspired to rush my way through. It’s not paced very well, solely because it tries for a Metroid vibe of non-linearity. During the PS2/Xbox/Gamecube era, many 3D games tried this approach to no avail, even Castlevania. The problem? Every room looks like a box. Whereas in a 2D environment they look fine, in 3D the same design philosophy doesn’t translate. It’s just boring, fatally so, when you know exactly how it goes – oh, this room is a puzzle! This room contains combat! The Sands of Time was linear, yes, but the rooms and places had a logic to them. You knew it was a real palace, and even with the switches and mirrors everywhere (game logic ahoy!), it still made sense as you made your way through a library, or barracks, or dungeon. Here, the Palace of Time (or whatever it’s called) exists solely to provide challenges in boxy rooms. It doesn’t help that a game this open and large has a functionally useless map – at least Castlevania: Lament of Innocence made the maps look like the solid blue, easily view-able lines of previous Castlevania and Metroid 2D adventures.

The time traveling aspect makes this even more confusing and bizarre. Honestly, I was expecting the “past” to look less dilapidated, but it just looks like the ugly future version, only with more bloom and color effects. The whole color scheme has been desaturated to the point where it’s very difficult to tell the difference between platforms and walls.

Wow, that’s a big list. On paper, the game seems like a natural evolution of the reboot series – in execution, however, it just falls flat, and I’ve only played an hour or so. I wouldn’t tell anyone to stay away, though – there’s fun to be gleaned, but that’s a lot of stuff to put up with in one game. Sigh…I guess I must if I want to play The Two Thrones, so get to it. I look at the secret ending online, thanks.

The Mirror Lied – This is a short twenty minute adventure game involving a faceless girl, fire, and a bird. It was created by Freebird Games, who are responsible for some other indie games I haven’t ever played (at least I’m honest about it). This represents everything I hate about indie games – pretension for the sole purpose of pretension, story-telling that doesn’t make any sense, and artists trying to become game makers. Frankly, it doesn’t work. It is a little creepy, though, only because I have no idea what’s happening.

Does it mean anything? I guess! I can’t imagine what, though. It’s just a pretentious indie game, by my standards. I don’t know what I’m supposed to get out of it, nor do I know how I am supposed to interpret something so abstract, vague, and weird. Maybe it’s something about childhood? Maybe it’s about a secret agent? Why does everything disappear? Stuff exploding? It’s an odd Rorshach test of various elements tha tnever quite coheres into anything substantial or meaningful…or fun. Just creepy.

Still, it’s free and if you have 20-30 minutes to spare (me? I must be very bad at this, because it took me 30+ minutes), you should at least try it out and tell me why I’m wrong! Get it here.